Things I Learned About Our Wedding Planning Season (Thus Far)

• I was never meant to be a "Bridechilla". I am born on a fire sun in the year of the monkey. I was meant to be restless, overproductive, and optimizing.
• We did have a lot of fights during this time. Over budgets, finances, preferences, priorities, expectations. There is no shame in it and no hiding it. We had fights. Thankfully, none of them has been dirty.
• I still cannot believe I'm getting married. It's not because "I've been dreaming about this since I was a child". Quite contrary. I haven't dreamt of this and yet it is happening. To me. Right now. With him. Amidst all these.
• I have never pondered on my choice of husband. I'm sure in high school I've listed criteria of boys I would like and want to end up with, but those notebooks are long gone. So I have no profile. But I have Josh. And he seems to be a good husband. Better than I expected, perhaps.
• One thing that has been consistent with us in more than five years is how patient he is. I am a restless bitch who suddenly laughs in the middle of a fight. He's seen my crazies. We've been together through the toughest adulting phases. Yet we are still together. Stronger than ever. Nowhere near perfect. But stronger.
• I have an idea of what my future will be. It may or may not feature a husband, but doing those things with Josh would really make me happy.
• Since I'm not chill, I'm just hoping I'm not putting too much pressure on him. I want this to be fun, even if we have fights. I want us to remember how strong this planning made us.
• I could not think of a better person to go through this season with than with him.